Getting My Gluten FreeK on at the Mellow Mushroom

Headed to Austin.  Meeting friends at a pizza joint. 

I was feeling pretty anxious about food arrangements so I called ahead to The Mellow Mushroom to verify that there would be nothing there that I could eat.

"Is there any chance y'all have gluten free items?  Yes?!?  You have a menu of six pizzas and I can custom order one if I want?  Can you tell me how you prepare the gluten free pizzas so I can determine if I would be able to eat it?" 

The guy on the other end sound very excited to be able to tell me about the special measures they take to assure the gluten free pizzas are guarded from cross contamination:

• The cook removes their apron, washes hands, puts on new gloves and a new apron.
• The pizza is assembled in the 'cooler' with fresh ingredients.  The other pizzas are made up front
• A screen is placed on the stone so that the crust never touches it.

He sounded so confident and reassuring that I felt confident and reassured...

...but I still asked my server the same questions when I got there.  She told me all the same steps they would take to keep my pizza gluten free and dare I say, she almost looked excited about my special requests!  No blank stare, no huff, only reassurance!  Then she brought me an extensive gluten free menu that reiterated their cross contamination precautions. 

I ordered the Kosmic Karma and mellowed out until the pizza came. 

That's when I freaked out!  It was beautiful: fresh basil, fresh tomatos, fresh pesto and feta cheese!  The crust was gluten-free-good: not gritty, not gooey (I still miss the chew of glutenous crust).  The toppings placed it over the top.  I ate half of it right then and there!!

Best part about that pizza?  I didn't wake up with Lady Gaga claw hands this morning! 

Happy Gluten Free Anniversary To Me!

It's been a year. 

June 1st of 2011 was the day of my endoscopy.  It was the day I decided to give up gluten, before I even got my test results. 

It was the start of a new life.

Within days of eliminating gluten from my diet, I started feeling better.  I could not believe how the seemingly unrelated health issues that bothered me for years started to resolve themselves-- just by changing my diet.  By time I went back to see my gastrointerologist, I didn't care what the endoscopy said. 

"I know you just told me I have a life long auto-immune disease, but thank you." I said to my doctor when he confirmed that I did, indeed, have celiac disease. 

He looked me square in the eyes, stared at me for a minute then said, "You're not crazy." 

I almost started to cry.  I had been told nothing was physically wrong with me for so long, that I was starting to believe it was all in my head.   

I started coming out from under a fog a year ago and I never want to go back. 

I never want to go back to:

• Constant fatigue
• Snoring
• Chronic sinus infections
• Sleep apnea
• Unexplained weight gain
• Aching joints
• Endometriosis
• Irrational food cravings
• Feeling hangry (a bad mix of hungry and angry)
• Dry eyes
• Itchy scalp
• Yearly strep infections
• Mouth ulcers
• Puffy face
• Brain fog
• Backne (you know, acne on your back)
• Hair loss
• Chronic rash on my chest
• Bloated stomach

All of these issues cleared up or started improving as soon as my body cycled out the gluten in my system. 

I'm still recovering from being dismissed and discounted for so long. 

I'm not going to get back the fourteen plus years searching for what was wrong with me. 

But I have this year and the years ahead of me.  I have the knowledge of what 'healthy' feels like. 

It feels pretty darn good! 

I've had immeasurable support from my family and friends these past twelve months.  I have seen continued resistance from those trained in Western medicine; doctors refusing to hear that celiac disease doesn't always follow their flow chart to digestive symptoms. 

This has been a year of learning, healing, trials and triumphs. 

It's been a good year.

Do you remember when you first went gluten free?  Please share your journey with me.

Ball in Play

Here's the playing field: Mexican restaurant on a quiet Sunday, large group of people.  The restaurant had a separate gluten free menu.  I explain to our server that I can not tolerate any amount of gluten.  He was very reassuring and attentive.  I asked about the tortilla chips on the table:

"Are the ingredients gluten free?"  Yes.
"Do you fry them here?"  Yes.
"Do you have a dedicated fryer?"  Yes.
"Does anything else go in the fryer with the chips?"  No.  No, we don't fry anything else with them.
"Are you sure?"  Yes.
"Are you positive nothing else goes in the fryer?"  Yes.

So, I ate the chips with measured glee.  The green salsa was divine--tasted like it could have had pineapple in it.  And then out of left field I see our server heading for me like a baseball player diving for a line drive.

"Stop eating the chips!  Don't eat any more chips!"   He said breathlessly.  Apparently the chip fryer was a shared fryer.

How'd the ball get dropped?  I don't know.  Sometimes they just get past you.  But you still have to pick it up and try not to let it mess with your head. 

"Do you think you got glutened?" asked my friend. 

All I could think was, "I don't know.  I don't want to be.  I'm not going to be.  If I am, I'm going to muscle my way through it like I have for the past fourteen years before I knew I had celiac disease.  And the last thing I'm going to do is talk about it at a dinner table full of guests."  I smiled through and maybe I laughed a little too loud at jokes but I didn't enjoy the rest of my meal.  I just couldn't.

That was five days ago.

I did pretty well.  I almost faked myself out.  I blamed my irrational thoughts and irritablity on my hormones.  I blamed my fatigue on the fact that our a/c had gone out.  I blamed my itchy skin on the pool water.  And I tried really, really hard to ignore the nagging pain that was getting worse under my right rib. 

I dropped the ball.  I let myself be glutened.  So I took a little dirt-nap?   I'm brushing myself off and getting back in the game. 

I'll go back to the play book and see if I can make some different calls next time.

Countertop Strawberry Ice "Cream"

Strawberry "Ice Cream" in the Vitamix and on the counter.

Looking through all the beautiful food blogs and gluten free recipe sites reminds me of the time my friend, who was a professional photographer, spoke to a group of mothers about how to take great photos.  One mom said, "I have to take hundreds of pictures before I get a great shot."  My friend told her, "Me too, but I'm a professional.  Do you know what that means?  That means I only have to show you the good pictures I've taken.  I don't show the bad pictures to you.  That's what makes me a professional." 

Well, I guess I'm not a pro at blogging yet, because I'd like you to see the reality of cooking.  Gluten free or not, cooking can be messy and outcomes imperfect. 

It made a decent pizza crust.



What was supposed to be a gluten free french baguette!?!

 "If you're not going to be ready to fail, you're not going to learn how to cook." said Julia Child. 

 

It's time to try that gluten free recipe that looks delicious.

What's the worst that is going to happen?  Maybe you'll have to throw out something made from expensive gluten free flour; but I'll bet it's still cheaper than a tenuous meal at any restaurant.

Go fearlessly into your kitchens and let me know who comes out alive!

Countertop Strawberry 'Ice Cream'

6-8 large strawberries (frozen may actually work best)

1 frozen banana, cut in pieces

1/2 can coconut milk

1-2 cups of ice as necessary to make thick

Place berries, banana and about 1 cup of ice in a blender.  Add 1/4 cup of coconut milk and beging blending.  Add ice and/or coconut milk until mixture is blended and becomes too thick to pour.  Transfer to a container (this is where the mess happened) and place in freezer to harden.

Serve with fresh mint, sliced strawberries, chocolate syrup or any other topping you like!

 

 

Eating Gluten Free at a Restaurant Doesn't Have to Be a Crêpeshoot

There are reports that a biker gang has been on the roll to the local crêperie on Sunday mornings.  Be on the look out for them.  Among them are:

 Texadians throwing gang signs.

They are riding dirty with big fat tires and are looking for a java fix. 

It's been substantiated that there is a Celiac among them and she's packin'.  Eyewitnesses confirm that she's carrying her own gluten free crêpes and she's not afraid to take them out in public. 

I've been wanting to ride to our local shopping village for quite some time.  A group of us decided to head up one Sunday for breakfast and coffee. 

I wasn't going to miss out on the first group bike ride even if the destination was a crêpe shop.  I didn't think they'd have any gluten free offerings.  And I was pretty sure if they did, I still wouldn't eat them because it is a small, flour filled environment. 

None the less, I went and had a great time.  I had a cup of coffee and a bag of chips. 

There's somthing about eating outside that makes all food taste better.  The company, the weather and the setting made that one of the best bag of chips I've ever eaten.


This week, we decided to roll again. 


When I was trying to talk myself into getting out of bed, the idea came to bring my own gluten free crêpes.  It was awesome! 

Crêpes, fresh strawberries, whipped coconut 'cream', scrambled eggs, Sriracha sauce and the magic combination that made those the best crêpes I've ever eaten!

Quick Gluten Free Crêpes

1 large egg

1/4 cup of Pamela's Baking and Pancake Mix

Water

Heat a no-stick fry pan that is the size of the crêpe you want to make.  Add a slice of butter to the pan and melt.

  Mix the egg and pancake mix until it makes a paste.  Slowly add water in tablespoon increments and mix.  Keep adding water until the batter is very thin (almost the consistency of whole milk). 

Pour batter into hot fry pan until there is a thin layer in the middle.  Swirl the pan to make the batter run from the middle of the pan out to the edges.  Cook on medium heat until the top of the crêpe  looks mostly dry.  Flip and cook until done.

Remove from pan and fill with your favorite gluten free ingredients:

Strawberries

Bananas

Nutella

Peaches

Peanut Butter

Raspberries

Honey

Whipped Cream

Eggs

Ham

Sauteed Mushrooms

Carmalized Onions

Spinach

Brie

Feta Cheese

Pesto

Chicken
Goats Cheese
Orange Marmalade

THEN GO EAT IT OUTSIDE!

Look at ME! I'm Trendy!!

It's taken me years but I'm finally 'trendy'!  I've tried so many times to be 'hot'.

I wore Shirley Temple dresses with bells sewn in the petticoats when other kids had Garanimals.  It didn't take off.

I had some of the first round framed, over sized Photo Sensitive glasses.  I just knew everyone who made fun of them was jealous!

I wore a 12 pound body cast for the first nine months of my high school career.  Not a single classmate tried to copy that fashion statement.

Even as adult I was sure my macrame shoes and unique dance moves would become all the rage.

Years of trying and I've never, ever, not once, been cutting edge or 'trendy'. 

But here it is!!!! My backstage pass is an auto immune disease that permeates every fiber of my daily life and makes me anxious everytime I need to eat!  Who knew?!!?

Did you see the girl on the left roll her eyes when she was talking about Celiac Disease?  She's SOO jealous!  I bet she wishes she had to examine every. single. morsel. that goes into her mouth!

Did you see the girl on the right nod her head, shake her hair and sarcastically say Celiac Disease is 'hot'?  She's SOO envious that she doesn't have debilitating fatigue that robbed her of fourteen years of living a full life. 

They both wish that western medicine treated them like they were crazy.  Who doesn't love attention from the bad boys?

They're just green with envy that we're 'hot' and they're not! 

But alas, fads are fleeting and our time in the spotlight will be short lived.  After trying to play 'gluten free for the weekend' and realizing the enormous amount of dedication it takes to live uncontaminated, the fakers will drop by the wayside.  Or they'll invent a magic pill that will be promoted as making it an easier proposition.  So let's enjoy the limelight while we can.  We Celiacs are the real deal. 

In the years to come when the posers tell us, "I tried going gluten free once... back in the twenty-teens, " we can smile...

...because we will still be walking the walk.  We didn't choose to be trendy.  We just are.

Oh, Oh Domino's! Not Your Gluten Free Best

Domino's has announced they now offer a gluten free pizza crust. 

To their credit, they are being very honest about the fact that their kitchens are not gluten free and that there is no special prep areas for their structurally gluten free pizza. 

But it only takes twelve seconds of this video to turn me gluten freeky!

Where has that ladle been?!?!?  Do all the pizzas go on the same pans?!?!?!  Look at that ungloved hand reaching into the mushrooms!!!  That pizza slicer looks like a wheel of death to me...

Some studies have shown that up to 100 mg of gluten a day may be tolerated by Celiacs but as little as 10 mg can set off an auto immune response.   This picture shows you an approximation of what 100 mg of gluten would look like.  That's a Ritz Cracker**, folks...

Even the smallest amount of gluten will attack the immune system of a celiac, no matter how 'mild' you think you have it.

I know that I should not eat Domino's new gluten free pizza. What worries me is that others with celiac disease might not know that they shouldn't eat it either; or that they might be enticed by the allure of this easy pie.

My concern is that the gluten free fad is rolling so far out of control, that those of us who should never have gluten are going to get run down by bandwagoneers waving flags of gluten free products over our smushed little immune systems.
 
It's not enough to call something 'gluten free'.  It must be prepared in a separate, safe area that is free from cross contact.

Don't want to discuss it
I think it's time for a change
You may get disgusted
And start thinkin' that I'm actin' strange
In that case I'll go underground
Get some heavy rest
Never have to worry
About what is worst and what is best


Oh, oh, Domino's.


**No Celiacs were harmed in the taking of this picture. (I wore gloves and took it in our 'gluten' corner.)