Not All Eggplants are Created Equal

 

As a kid, I loved going to the grocery store with my mom.  It was part adventure, part education, part scavenger hunt and pure art. 

 

My mother wasn't a woman of many words, because she didn't have to be.  Her words were chosen carefully and always counted.  'Prattle' was never something she did.

 

Groceries were selected as carefully and meticulously as her words.  Food was purchased based on merit; vegetables were examined, fish was smelled, meat was moved out from under the 'pink' light of the butcher case into the harsh fluorescent light to check for freshness. 

 

When I was young, I watched her every move, soaking up insight as to why one onion was chosen over another.  As a teenager, I would cringe when the butcher would go in the back to pull out his best cuts  for her; knowing she was going to take them and walk away from the counter to examine and smell the meat.  Even though I was embarrassed, as I developmentally had to be, I knew I was watching a master at work.  And I learned:

 

Meat needs to be slightly marbled.  Pineapples should be fragrant but fish shouldn't.  Never buy a dented can and always, always buy a male eggplant.

 

Wait.  What?

 

The boy eggplants, those are the ones you want.  They have fewer seeds and will be less bitter.

 

How can you tell the boys from the girls? 

 

It's easy.  Turn them over and look at their, scar/bellybutton/dimple on the bottom. 

 

 

 
The boys, you see, have a long, oval mark.

The girls are round.

Now, some eggplants are ambiguously marked.

If you look at one and you can't readily tell what it is, put it back.

Androgyny worked for David Bowie but doesn't make for tasty aubergines.

Someone laughed at me once for calling eggplants 'male' and 'female' so I did a slice test for him. 

 

The 'girl' was full of seeds and the boy had fewer, as you see below. 

 

Try it if you don't believe it, but be sure to salt the girl eggplant and let it sit for a while to remove some of the bitterness.  Rinse it and pat it dry before cooking.

Pick a 'boy' eggplant and you won't need to salt and rinse your eggplant to make it sweeter.



This is a boy eggplant.

 

 

 

 

Eggplant can be a versatile forgiving fruit once you learn to avoid the ones full of bitter seeds.  It can be made into a summer spread like caponata, fried as an appetizer or base for eggplant parmigiana or even sliced thin to use as lasagna noodles and more!

 

Enjoy!